Jessica's Footprint

Today is Jessica's 17th birthday. I can't imagine what she would look like or how her personality would be at this age. I think she would have been as beautiful as Alyssa and Sarah but a whole other being entirely. I would have loved to watch her grow up. This is grief 16 years later... it's just a terrible feeling that never really goes away. I'm writing this because soon I will be publicly speaking to a group of recently bereaved parents and I know they will be looking ...to me to see how I manage, how I cope after all this time. It is a learned behaviour I think - the world carries on around us so we too carry on. I know its good to wear this on my sleeve and talk about it but it just so damn frustrating and sad to sometimes talk about. Keep talking, keep telling the story though. Though it could be very coincidental, the song I had in my head this morning was Abba - Dancing Queen. Jessie made sure it was on the radio when I got in the car this morning - the caller who requested it was named Jessica... No matter where Jessie is on her birthday, I do know she is near me, I can feel her and really isn't that what want most on our child's birthday but to be with them? Its not perfect by any stretch but I'm stretching to feel ok on this day. See more

When your baby girl is on a slide with the likes of the people on the left.....#sheisthecutest Su2c (stand up tp cancer)

Summit in Santa Monica, California. Thanks to Su2c (stand up tp cancer) for this great opportunity and to our Canada Cancer Stem Cell Dream Team.