Kelowna Counselling and Psychotherapy
1361 Glenview Ave. V1Y 7B3 Kelowna, BC, Canada

"I’ve found a couple things that have helped me."

"Ive found a couple things that have helped me."

I love this memory of a meme

Boundaries help us feel safe. (Image via Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach)

Free & confidential counselling for those who use controlling behaviours within their intimate partner relationships. Program is facilitated by registered professional counsellors. For referral & more info click here: http://www.johnhowardbc.ca//services/justice/stop-program/

Worldwide there are over 4 million stillbirths each year. So why are we staying silent? We need to talk about stillbirth.... For more resources and information about stillbirth visit Star Legacy Foundation and Still Aware. Many of the photos in this video were taken by volunteers from Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep. For more information about their organization, visit https://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/ (Video published by An Unexpected Family Outing.)

A good reminder for all humanKIND. : @thegoodandgoldco

"In my work with anxious children, I have found it tremendously beneficial for both parents and kids to have a toolkit full of coping skills from which to choose."

Some tips on how to tackle social anxiety to make day-to-day events less overwhelming. Do you live with social anxiety? What strategies do you use? #GETLOUD #mentalhealth

On Tuesday night at dinner, my eleven-year-old daughter casually told us she hid in the schools walk-in freezer with her class for about five minutes during a ...code-red drill that happened during lunch. The food in my throat got stuck. I wanted to cry, but instead I used what Id learned from the experts. I asked open-ended questions so my child could take the leadshow me where she needed more information and how she felt about the situation. Her responses indicated there was no reason to create further angst by adding my own emotional reaction to the situation. Last night at dinner, the topic came up again as we prayed for the families in Parkland, Florida whose beloveds never came home from school yesterday. Id intentionally given myself time to take in the news reports and cry before our family sat down at the table. Processing what I could beforehand allowed me to keep my emotions in check at dinner. Again, it was my eleven-year-old child who was most vocal. She reiterated what she would do if she was in the bathroom, separated from her class, when a code-red sounded. Since that was the second time she brought it up, I could tell that was her biggest concern. Our family talked through the Active Shooter Response protocol of run-hide-fight. (Link at bottom of the post.) After dinner, my daughters were doing homework upstairs while my husband and I watched the news reports. I could have easily kept watching, but I turned off the television and went to spend time with each of my children. When I said Id been watching the news about the shooting, my eleven-year-olds response indicated she didnt want to talk about it. I took her lead and laid beside her, arms wrapped tightly around her. Thats when she told me, I helped someone crying today on the playground. I didnt know her name, but shes in my grade. I went over and sat with her. She didnt want to tell me what was wrong, but she wanted me to stay, so thats what I did. Do you think you helped her? I asked. Yes, because she stopped crying and she smiled. I still dont know what was wrong, but sometimes just knowing you are not alone makes things better. I kissed my childs forehead and thanked her for her using her heart and her presence to help someone. I then went to my fourteen-year-olds room. She had not said much about the shooting. I figured since it did not directly impact her life, it was not on her radar. I couldve not been more wrong. Lay with me, my daughter said. I hadnt heard that in a while. With arms around her, I waited quietly to see what might come. What came was more information than even I knew about the shooting. What came were details from a video taken by a student in one of the classrooms. What came was a detailed plan of what she would do in such a situation, and how she would contact me if she didnt have a phone. What came was a conversation about weird vibes she gets from two classmates. What came was a plan to report any social media posts made by classmates that make her feel concerned. What came was talk of the benefits of therapy and counseling. She said, Everyone needs someone who will just listen to them sometimes. All at once, I realized that both my daughters, in their own unique ways, needed to talk through what they were seeing, hearing, and experiencing. All at once, I realized that both of my children had good instincts about keeping themselves safe that I could affirm and expand through reoccurring talks. All at once, I realized both my children knew the vital importance the life-saving potential of listening. For parents to listen to children For kids to listen to each other I thought about my current anchor, a powerful quote by David W. Augsburger: Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable. Im quite certain that those of us reunited with loved ones last night felt the preciousness of that reunion deeply and loved especially well. But there is something that seems even more critical these days than unconditional love and that is unconditional attention. It is asking hard questions and then sitting still to hear the response. It is turning off the television and leaving the phone in another room. It is lying beside them until the words come. It is hearing things that are hard to hear. It is not assuming they are fine on the inside because they dont have much to say. It is being availablenot just in the wake of tragedybut every day, so theres a foundation already in place when trouble arises and support is needed. Because it was important to get some sleep, I switched the topic to something positive before I left my daughter. Tell me how your friends liked their mini cherry pies, I said. My daughter had spent six hours on the weekend baking eleven cherry pies and putting them into little brown boxes with ribbon for Valentines Day. They were all so excited, but especially Graceshe was the most excited. My daughter knew it would be Grace. Shed chosen the pie with the braided crust for Grace because out of all her friends, she knew Grace is the kind of person who notices the extra effort, care, and love when it is given. This is what is important. This is what we must do for our loved onesinvest time, attention, and care into our daily interactions so that no matter what they face, they will see our eyes, the nodding of our head, the feel of our hand and in their darkest hour, they will not feel alone. Rachel Macy Stafford 2018 NYT bestselling author & certified special education teacher *Written in honor and with great love for the victims and survivors of the shooting at the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida on February 14, 2018. When I asked people who had survived tragedy how we can cultivate and show more compassion for people who are suffering, the answer was always the same: Dont shrink away from the joy of your child because Ive lost mine. Dont take what you have for grantedcelebrate it. Be grateful and share your gratitude with others. One quote that I heard over and over was simply: When you honor what you have, youre honoring what Ive lost. Bren Brown Thank you for being part of The Hands Free Revolution. #onlylovetoday #listen #florida #parkland LINK - the Active Shooter Response protocol of run-hide-fight: https://busymommymedia.com/teaching-kids-what-to-do-in-an-/

Truth is now emerging of what I have been sharing for years. Oh so beautiful is this :) Love it! :)

Don't forget to join in Tomorrow!!!! Tuesdays with Tonya at 10AM!!!! I'm stepping out of my box and getting personal!!!! With my "WHY" and lets not forget I always end with a Do You Know?????

Couples are building an emotional bank account using bids for emotional connection as currency.

Dont forget to join in Tomorrow!!!! Tuesdays with Tonya at 10AM!!!! Im stepping out of my box and getting personal!!!! With my "WHY" and lets not forget I always end with a Do You Know?????

"Even while our society has made incredible strides in the legalization of same-sex marriage, the idea that a relationship could include more than two people ha...s remained a tabooeven when one in five Americans claim that they have been in a relationship with more than one person. According to a study published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy in April 2016, 21 percent of people have had a nonmonogamous relationshipone in which all partners agree that each may have romantic and/or sexual relationships with other partners. The data, pulled from 8,718 respondents in the annual Singles in America survey, is clear: Polyamoryhaving more than one sexual or romantic partner, with all partners agreeing to the arrangementis a common type of relationship." https://www.self.com/story/polyamorous-relationship

It's important to know what to look out for.

Its Friday and time to get ready for the weekend. Heres a fun way to reward yourself for self-care practices you may have done this last week. #selfcare #mentalhealth #share http://ift.tt/2Drg1eU

It isnt your job to try and please everyone or fulfill their every whim. Focus on what you want and remember that your needs matter too! #selfcompassion #inspirationalquotes #mindfulness #share http://ift.tt/2DfLTTN

Its important to know what to look out for.

"All young people need to be aware that they have mental health, in just the same way as they have physical health," - via Mental Health Commission of Canada and Metro #mentalhealth #GETLOUD

The word true feels important to me as a I read this quote. And I believe it could be replaced with the word Authentic- Authentic happiness. Authentic joy. ...Authentic inner peace. I spent years and years searching for happiness, joy and peace. Outside of myself. It is still my go-to place to look. I will often, automatically, look for it in other people, in other places, in other things. And for sure I have had some wonderful experiences this way. Great experiences and trips away, great conversations with other people, a beautiful new piece of clothing or furniture which I enjoy. All things that can give me a sense of happiness or joy, but usually fleetingly. I remember reading Dr Martin Seligmans work and learning about the difference between having a good life an engaged life and a meaningful life. A good life being one of experiences and a focus on things outside of myself. A new pair of shoes, a new house, a new car, a holiday, but his research showed, while great in the moment, these things do not lead to sustainable satisfaction, happiness and joy. They need to be continually replaced by another new thing or experience. Whereas a focus on living an engaged life and a meaningful life led to long term and more sustainable happiness. An engaged life being one where we know our strengths and values and live a life where we are in congruence with these. A meaningful life takes it one step further. Where we live a life aligned with our strengths and values and also in services of something greater than ourselves whatever that may be perhaps our family, community, the environment or an organisation. To live either an engaged or meaningful life, to find true happiness, true joy, and true inner-peace we have to start our quest by looking in the mirror, by knowing who we are, by getting clear on our values, strengths, purpose and passions. What brings us alive. What feels important to us to be in service too. We need to understand ourselves and just as importantly we need to learn to love and genuinely care for ourselves. And what a journey this has been for me. A transformative, albeit at times very painful journey to really get to know myself, to really learn to care about myself. To start to live an authentic and meaningful life. To start to experience true happiness, true joy and a sense of true inner peace. And in my own personal experience it all begins with Compassionate Self-Awareness. With great warmth Jo To support you on your own quest, weve created a unique online training course The Compassionate Self-Awareness Program to Know Yourself, Care for Yourself and Be Yourself. It is for women looking for inspiration, motivation and a step-by-step path for change towards more inner confidence, calm and connection for a more authentic and meaningful life. And we believe were not meant to do this alone. So, for a limited time, when you buy one Program, we will give you another one free to share with a girlfriend. Experience friend power rather than willpower as you go on this transformational journey. ENROL NOW, 2 for 1 offer authenticwoman.co/join To truly be ourselves, we must first know and befriend ourselves. #authenticwoman #consciouswoman #compassionateselfawareness #selfcompassion #selfawareness #inspiringwomen #compassion #meaningful #selfcare #selflove #awareness #consciousness #beourselves #authenticity #knowyourself #careforyourself #beyourself #selfacceptance #selfkindness #annelamott #taderinger #photobyalimarel

I am continuing to learn how to transcend this because I know I can." http://www.huffingtonpost.ca//lady-gaga-ptsd-open-letter_u

How chronic stress can affect the brains size, structure, and how it functions:

How chronic stress can affect the brain's size, structure, and how it functions:

Here are some reasons that facts don't convince people. (via Social Good Now)

Here are some reasons that facts dont convince people. (via Social Good Now)